
In Memoriam
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So you have a mental illness.. Which
Bipolar II
When were you diagnosis & how old were you?
I was diagnosed when I was 18 years old when I was a freshman in college. It was the start of many years of out of control reckless behavior.
How do you cope with your mental illness?
TAKE MY MEDS! I’m currently on Lithium, Risperedone, Latuda, Lamictal, Zoloft and Klonopin. I don’t go anywhere without my Klonopin because once I get hit with that butterfly feeling in my stomach, I know whats coming and I need to get a handle on it before it spirals out of control.
I also see my therapist 2x a week and Medication Management biweekly.
My family doesn’t understand my disorder and think I can just grow up and snap out of it so they choose to ignore it. My husband is the only person who I have to lean on which doesn’t always help me because he himself has OCD and Major Depressive Disorder.
Lots of personal pep talks to myself to get through the day.
What are 3 words that you would describe how your illness makes you feel?
irratic, angry, exhausted
What are some ways you relax from your illness?
I remove myself from everyone. I refinish furniture for fun so I will try and get into a project but it doesn’t always work. I’ve spent many hours sitting on the steps to my shop and just staring out into nothing. Everything is silent and it feels great for my brain.
What is some advice you would give to your fellow soldiers fighting this fight?
Find support. Personally, I do not like groups. I am uncomfortable around a group of strangers that I have to talk to let alone divulge intimate information about myself. With a family that isn’t really supportive of what I am going through, I lean on my husband a lot and have one friend that I will text when I’m feeling like the poo will be hitting the fan. Sometimes, no matter how crazy your mind is going, its good to just verbalize it and get it out. Almost like letting the air out of a balloon. If you think you can keep everything in and be ok, you are wrong and something, usually a little thing will make everything fall apart.
Do you have any books, websites, writers, shows, music, etc that has helped you cope that you like to share?
There is a podcast by Stuff you should know on Bipolar disorder. It was one of the best explanations of how I feel and what I go through that I have ever heard. It was matter of fact and very objective. I send the podcast link to friends or family that are trying to understand whats going on in my life.
Tell us your blog or how we can keep in contact with you?
hypomanicmama.wordpress.com
You can not understand how many times I have been unemployed, lost, and feeling like do do…
But not this time. I quit my job because I wasn’t going to work for a manager that talks shit behind my back. I’m bipolar, she just didn’t know…
Also, I hated HATED going into that job everyday. It was torturous to get up and pretend. I’m not a good pretender so it made my life really hard. Sometimes you have to worry about things like jobs, money, advancement, but for me right now it couldn’t be farther from my mind.
Right now I’m focusing on me and what the hell I want to do. My bipolar limits me to work at a conventionally setting without wanting to kill my coworkers and myself for longer than 4 months, so I have to find so,etching that is going to go along with my mind….
And the ride.
In other words, I’m okay and I’ll be okay.
How are you?
P.s. Thanks for all the Greta comments you are leaving me. Since I have no job please watch out for some crazy post… Literally.
Until now, I never how much someone can change incan instant. When someone says something around other people that they wouldn’t usually say…
Is that something to look into?
When out of the blue someone tells others and you something they have never told you personally, should you be concerned? How well do you know someone?
This can relate to mental illness because most people…hell majority of people don’t know about my mental illness. They see the mask I put on. So, is it okay to never tell your deepest darkness secrets to the one you love?
Is it okay to do something you hate for the sake of love/commitments?
Have I?
Posted in Read Along