Daily Archives: November 22, 2017

This Damn Job!

This damn job is not working out.  I have been sitting (AGAIN) with absolutely nothing to do for two days.  It makes me feel like such an asshole!!  It is anxiety-provoking on a couple of levels.  First of all, it makes me feel incompetent, like they don’t have any confidence in me to give me anything to do.  Second of all, I get scared that they don’t have anything for me to do, and that they’re going to get rid of me.  For someone who gets paranoid in the workplace, this is a hazardous environment.  Yesterday, I only lasted until about 2:30 pm, then I emailed the boss and said I was sick and left.  I stayed home “sick” today – I just couldn’t take another day of sitting on my ass and doing nothing!!  I know I’m not being wise – I’m not going to get paid for this time away.  I just don’t have tolerance for this bullshit!!

Today I am going to look for a new job.  There’s all this noise and chatter in my head about not having enough experience to find another job in Security, I am just going to ignore it and blindly apply for Security Analyst jobs.  I can’t imagine that they’re going to keep me at the current job if I just sit there doing nothing.  Fuck, I don’t know.  I just need to be busy and productive!!!  Anyway…

I know the holidays can be jam-packed with the feels for people, I hope you all have a good Thanksgiving.  I will be with the whole fam-damily, we’ll see how it goes.  Hopefully my Dad behaves and doesn’t act like an asshole.  Yay!  Holidays!!  Hugs to you all.  ❤ ❤ ❤

Filed under: Bipolar, Bipolar and Anxiety, Bipolar and Stress, Bipolar and Work, Psychology, Psychology Shmyshmology Tagged: Bipolar, Blogging, Mental Health, Mental Illness, Psychology, Reader

Penny Positive #25

From An Optimist’s Calendar



I plan to start my holiday baking as soon as I finish typing.  Two cobblers and some chocolate chip cookies.  I got up early this morning to work on them so I will be done once Bob gets home and we plan to leave.  Need to finish packing as well–so I’ll be a busy, busy bear today.

I think I am trying to get a cold.  I’m hoping I’m wrong in that.  I just have a little scratchiness in my throat and a sniffle.

I am so sleepy.  It’s taking me forever to type this because I keep yawning and stretching.  I didn’t sleep good last night so am sleepy this morning. Bob must feel really bad because he wanted to go to bed at 8:30 last night.

Need to run to the grocery store really quick to get some ice cream for our trip and Nyquil for Bob to take at night so he won’t be so sick.  I’m also praying to see who I can bless today with groceries.  I usually do that at Thanksgiving and hadn’t found the right time/way to do it this year.  So hopefully I can today.

I’ll be not posting tomorrow but may resume Friday depending on how our trip goes.  HOpe everyone has a blessed Thanksgiving.