Wed:
A tough day to get going. I slept okay, but woke up with back and tummy pain. Probably the diet. Today I am supposed to go to the dentist, yoga, and out for dinner for a friend’s birthday. I wonder if I will make it all.
I was proud of myself yesterday. I went to my bipolar group and really helped out. We had a sub as a leader and he was super nervous. I told him I would keep the conversation going and he wouldn’t have to worry. So I announced I wanted to talk about “guilt” for things we had done while manic. This topic really took off and covered most all of the meeting.
I also had a victory with a friend who just got out of the psych hospital. She used to attend our group about six months ago. I have stayed in touch with her and tried to be supportive. Well, she showed up yesterday at the meeting and really contributed. I was very proud of this.
I saw my CBT therapist also and we discussed me being so tired and having a hard time keeping up. She reminded me I am on a lot of drowsy inducing psych meds and also that I am only eating about 800 calories. She thinks being tired is pretty normal.
I was nice to Danny yesterday and did two loads of laundry for him. He is sick with a bad cold, so I thought I would help out. He tends to not do laundry till he has worn all of his clothes.
Good news! My CBT therapist said she could tell I was losing weight. She said she could see it in my face, tummy, and rear end. Those are all pretty good places to lose weight.
Okay, will be back tomorrow and let you know how I did getting around to things today.
Thurs:
Did make it to the dentist yesterday. Everything was fine there. Still wasn’t feeling too good.
Cheated on my diet with a peanut butter and jelly sandwich. I just had to have something to chew.
Did a couple more loads of laundry for Danny. He is now caught up.
Did not make it to yoga. Took a nap and saved my energy for going out to dinner last night for our friend’s birthday. I made good choices at the restaurant: a small Caesar salad and a side dish of vegetables.
Got up pretty well today. Have been talking about taking an additional Wellbutrin at one pm or so. Might keep me up a little later and let me sleep through 4 am. Not sleeping till six or so is tough for me.
Today I have: laundry (for me), an eye appointment, going to get more diet shakes, possibly yoga, a bit of sewing, reading, and a shower. Not a big day, but a lot to plow through.
Fri:
Well, went to walk to exercise this morning and it was a beautiful cool day. Bad news is my foot/leg started hurting about 3/4 of the way through the walk. Hopefully, it’s nothing to stop me from walking.
Got my laundry done yesterday and got my diet shakes. Got weighed in and lost 3 1/2 pounds. Have lost a total of about 23 pounds. I have a goal to lose 8 pounds for the next few months. I want to lose two more this month….so this week….since we only have one more week.
Saw the eye doctor and have healthy eyes but they needed some stronger glasses. So I ordered two new pair: one for the computer and some bifocals for every day. I also ordered some bifocal sunglasses on line. I should be in good shape.
Am going out with a friend for breakfast. Looking forward to some real food. Other than that need to iron more quilt squares (I’ll be ready to lay it out tomorrow!) and read my book.
Haven’t had much depression in the last few months. Some anxiety and irritability, but no depression. It’s such a relief!
Sat:
Splurged yesterday at breakfast and had banana nut pancakes. God, were they ever good!
Feeling really good this morning. Got up at 6:30 and was out the door by 7 to hit some garage sales. Found some cute stuff and a new painting for the living room.
Am going to do some light shopping with my daughter, get that quilt laid out (at least partially), get a shower, and have dinner out. All this eating out is hard on the diet. It’s also hard tonight because these people are from out-of-town. The guy is a childhood friend of my husband’s and he has his new girlfriend along. I haven’t met her yet, but I hear she is a manic handful. That’s all I need. Maybe I can offer her some Rexulti.
Sun:
Dinner with the new girlfriend proved to be okay. We went to one of my favorite restaurants and I had a few bites of their yummy carrot cake for dessert. Definitely NOT on the diet. I’m hitting it hard today through Wednesday.
Anyway, I am feeling good but am up at six here writing and have been up since four. I hate this early waking. I even took a Klonopin at 4 thinking it might help me go back to sleep but it didn’t work. I’m a little bummed because I hate going to church sleepy or worst case, missing church and sleeping in. Plus, it’s football today and we’re going to do a little shopping.
The early waking has sort of been a theme and I plan to ask the doc about it. But he is so busy I don’t see him till Oct 22nd! The good news is I feel pretty good, so it’s not like a crisis.
A little update: Went to church and did fine. Actually drove on the way to church. Plan on the football game and then just some rest.
Mon:
Well, our team lost by a mile yesterday, so I have football depression. LOL.
Today I feel like I am getting a little sick. Danny has had a bad cold for a week, so I know where I got it. The GOOD news is I feel fine emotionally. The other good news is that I don’t “have” to go anywhere today, so even if I feel sicker I can just stay home.
I laid out the new quilt yesterday, but one of the cats rolled around on it and messed up the squares. Ack!
(It looks like utter chaos now!)
So today will consist of messing around with some apps, a little sewing, a shower, and watching the presidential debate. Not a bad day.
Tuesday:
Got up at 5:30 with a dog that needed a potty break. Flipped on the TV and worked on apps.
I feel pretty good. My mood has been fairly stable for this last week or so. I credit the meds and the CBT for this.
Today is simple: get a massage, get a flu shot, mess with the quilt, and go to bipolar support. I invited my friend from there to go bowling with us. I hope she will.
I am angry with myself over my poor showing on my diet this week. I weigh in on Thursday and I’ll bet I have gained a pound or two. I have two days to slow this down, but I don’t know. I want so badly to hit my goal by the end of the year. But it seems that I want to eat more. Really sad. I also am not exercising like I could. I don’t even exercise for weight loss…I do it for stress and depression. No…my weight gain is all about what I put in my mouth.
So on that cheery note, I will leave you all for the week. Overall, I am doing really well. I hope you are too.
lily
