Daily Archives: June 20, 2016

Today has been busy in a very stressful way–had to run to Wal-Mart, get lunch, listen to the sisters fight, go to tutoring, go to dance practice, turn in my discussion points for class, and deal with the two dancers coming home sick from practice out in the heat.  And waiting for my husband to get home from work.  I’m very frazzled right now.

WE’re trying to get ready to go to Disney Saturday and that’s going to be a pain.  Getting clothes organized and all such as that.  WE’ll be gone for a week and are trying to.   keep all the plates spinning before we go and get them down out of the air one at a time.   So we will see what happens with that this week.

I have to go pick up meds as soon as my husband gets home and we will see about  that then.  I’m almost finished with my food project but am having trouble typing the last little bits.  I’m hoping to finish Thursday so I can turn it in Friday before we leave.  So it’s busy, busy, busy all around and I just want to get through it all.

Hope everyone has a good week.

 

Whenever a tragedy happens, some people throw around the word “Bipolar.” As in this latest atrocity in Orlando, the shooter’s wife pronounced that he was “bipolar.” No he was not bipolar! He may have been gay, he may have been abusing substances and steroids, and his wives, and most assuredly he may have had anger issues and Antisocial personality disorder, but he had no symptoms of bipolar disorder whatsoever.

Abusing steroids can cause all kinds of issues including massive anger, irritability, rage, aggression not to mention stroke and heart attack.

Antisocial personality disorder comes with these lovely (not) symptoms straight from the Mayo Clinic website :

Symptoms

Antisocial personality disorder (APD) signs and symptoms may include:

• Disregard for right and wrong
• Persistent lying or deceit to exploit others (?)
• Being callous, cynical and disrespectful of others
• Using charm or wit to manipulate others for personal gain or personal pleasure (?)
• Arrogance, a sense of superiority and being extremely opinionated (?)
• Recurring problems with the law, including criminal behavior
• Repeatedly violating the rights of others through intimidation and dishonesty
• Impulsiveness or failure to plan ahead (?)
• Hostility, significant irritability, agitation, aggression or violence
• Lack of empathy for others and lack of remorse about harming others
• Unnecessary risk-taking or dangerous behavior with no regard for the safety of self or others
• Poor or abusive relationships
• Failure to consider the negative consequences of behavior or learn from them
• Being consistently irresponsible and repeatedly failing to fulfill work or financial obligations (?)

I have made bold the issues that seem to come forth when looking at the Orlando shooter. I have put question marks by the ones that are possible, but upon which I don’t have any information. He abused his first wife, and basically held her hostage. He had anger issues, also probably compounded by steroid abuse, he obviously had no empathy for others. All the symptoms he exhibited are those of antisocial personality disorder. And also, apparently he was struggling with his own homosexual feelings, and that’s why he decided to take out his rage on innocent gay people.

Nothing here says bipolar disorder, the disorder people love to blame when things of this kind happen. Look at this post to see what bipolar disorder is. People who shoot and kill innocent people most likely do not have bipolar disorder, Even if they have bipolar disorder, they are NOT shooting others because of it, there is another comorbid issue such as possibly antisocial personality disorder that might cause them to commit the awful crime. People who have antisocial personality disorder are the sociopaths and psychopaths of the world. People who have bipolar disorder are decidedly not!

And his wife, the ultimate victim, he is slapping her around, and she is thinking of his future! Maybe if she had had him arrested for abusing her, who knows, this could all have been avoided. Who knows. I mean with a felony conviction, surely he could not have bought a gun. Surely. If they did a background check.

So people who have antisocial personality disorder are the sociopaths and the psychopaths of this world. The people who have bipolar disorder are decidedly NOT! SO the next time someone says “The shooter/murderer/heinous person must have been bipolar!” Answer them and say “Most probably not!” And you would be right!

Whenever a tragedy happens, some people throw around the word “Bipolar.” As in this latest atrocity in Orlando, the shooter’s wife pronounced that he was “bipolar.” No he was not bipolar! He may have been gay, he may have been abusing substances and steroids, and his wives, and most assuredly he may have had anger issues and Antisocial personality disorder, but he had no symptoms of bipolar disorder whatsoever.

Abusing steroids can cause all kinds of issues including massive anger, irritability, rage, aggression not to mention stroke and heart attack.

Antisocial personality disorder comes with these lovely (not) symptoms straight from the Mayo Clinic website :

Symptoms

Antisocial personality disorder (APD) signs and symptoms may include:

• Disregard for right and wrong
• Persistent lying or deceit to exploit others (?)
• Being callous, cynical and disrespectful of others
• Using charm or wit to manipulate others for personal gain or personal pleasure (?)
• Arrogance, a sense of superiority and being extremely opinionated (?)
• Recurring problems with the law, including criminal behavior
• Repeatedly violating the rights of others through intimidation and dishonesty
• Impulsiveness or failure to plan ahead (?)
• Hostility, significant irritability, agitation, aggression or violence
• Lack of empathy for others and lack of remorse about harming others
• Unnecessary risk-taking or dangerous behavior with no regard for the safety of self or others
• Poor or abusive relationships
• Failure to consider the negative consequences of behavior or learn from them
• Being consistently irresponsible and repeatedly failing to fulfill work or financial obligations (?)

I have made bold the issues that seem to come forth when looking at the Orlando shooter. I have put question marks by the ones that are possible, but upon which I don’t have any information. He abused his first wife, and basically held her hostage. He had anger issues, also probably compounded by steroid abuse, he obviously had no empathy for others. All the symptoms he exhibited are those of antisocial personality disorder. And also, apparently he was struggling with his own homosexual feelings, and that’s why he decided to take out his rage on innocent gay people.

Nothing here says bipolar disorder, the disorder people love to blame when things of this kind happen. Look at this post to see what bipolar disorder is. People who shoot and kill innocent people most likely do not have bipolar disorder, Even if they have bipolar disorder, they are NOT shooting others because of it, there is another comorbid issue such as possibly antisocial personality disorder that might cause them to commit the awful crime. People who have antisocial personality disorder are the sociopaths and psychopaths of the world. People who have bipolar disorder are decidedly not!

And his wife, the ultimate victim, he is slapping her around, and she is thinking of his future! Maybe if she had had him arrested for abusing her, who knows, this could all have been avoided. Who knows. I mean with a felony conviction, surely he could not have bought a gun. Surely. If they did a background check.

So people who have antisocial personality disorder are the sociopaths and the psychopaths of this world. The people who have bipolar disorder are decidedly NOT! SO the next time someone says “The shooter/murderer/heinous person must have been bipolar!” Answer them and say “Most probably not!” And you would be right!

This is bipolar disorder. People who shoot and kill innocent people most likely do not have bipolar disorder, Even if they have bipolar disorder, they are NOT shooting others because of it, there is another comorbid issue such as possibly antisocial personality disorder. People who have antisocial personality disorder are the sociopaths and psychopaths of the world. People who have bipolar disorder are decidedly not!

Bipolar disorder is (from the Mayo Clinic website): Bipolar disorder, formerly called manic depression, causes extreme mood swings that include emotional highs (mania or hypomania) and lows (depression). When you become depressed, you may feel sad or hopeless and lose interest or pleasure in most activities. When your mood shifts in the other direction, you may feel euphoric and full of energy. Mood shifts may occur only a few times a year or as often as several times a week.

For both a manic and a hypomanic episode, during the period of disturbed mood and increased energy, three or more of the following symptoms (four if the mood is only irritable) must be present and represent a noticeable change from your usual behavior:

Criteria for a manic or hypomanic episode

The DSM-5 has specific criteria for the diagnosis of manic and hypomanic episodes:

• A manic episode is a distinct period of abnormally and persistently elevated, expansive or irritable mood that lasts at least one week (or less than a week if hospitalization is necessary). The episode includes persistently increased goal-directed activity or energy.
• A hypomanic episode is a distinct period of abnormally and persistently elevated, expansive or irritable mood that lasts at least four consecutive days.

For both a manic and a hypomanic episode, during the period of disturbed mood and increased energy, three or more of the following symptoms (four if the mood is only irritable) must be present and represent a noticeable change from your usual behavior:

• Inflated self-esteem or grandiosity
• Decreased need for sleep (for example, you feel rested after only three hours of sleep)
• Unusual talkativeness
• Racing thoughts
• Distractibility
• Increased goal-directed activity (either socially, at work or school, or sexually) or agitation
• Doing things that are unusual and that have a high potential for painful consequences — for example, unrestrained buying sprees, sexual indiscretions or foolish business investments

To be considered a manic episode:

• The mood disturbance must be severe enough to cause noticeable difficulty at work, at school or in social activities or relationships; or to require hospitalization to prevent harm to yourself or others; or to trigger a break from reality (psychosis).
• Symptoms are not due to the direct effects of something else, such as alcohol or drug use; a medication; or a medical condition.

To be considered a hypomanic episode:

• The episode is a distinct change in mood and functioning that is not characteristic of you when the symptoms are not present, and enough of a change that other people notice.
• The episode isn’t severe enough to cause significant difficulty at work, at school or in social activities or relationships, and it doesn’t require hospitalization or trigger a break from reality.
• Symptoms are not due to the direct effects of something else, such as alcohol or drug use; a medication; or a medical condition.

Criteria for a major depressive episode

The DSM-5 also lists criteria for diagnosis of a major depressive episode:

• Five or more of the symptoms below over a two-week period that represent a change from previous mood and functioning. At least one of the symptoms is either depressed mood or loss of interest or pleasure.
• Symptoms can be based on your own feelings or on the observations of someone else.

Signs and symptoms include:

• Depressed mood most of the day, nearly every day, such as feeling sad, empty, hopeless or tearful (in children and teens, depressed mood can appear as irritability)
• Markedly reduced interest or feeling no pleasure in all — or almost all — activities most of the day, nearly every day
• Significant weight loss when not dieting, weight gain, or decrease or increase in appetite nearly every day (in children, failure to gain weight as expected can be a sign of depression)
• Either insomnia or sleeping excessively nearly every day
• Either restlessness or slowed behavior that can be observed by others
• Fatigue or loss of energy nearly every day
• Feelings of worthlessness or excessive or inappropriate guilt, such as believing things that are not true, nearly every day
• Decreased ability to think or concentrate, or indecisiveness, nearly every day
• Recurrent thoughts of death or suicide, or suicide planning or attempt

To be considered a major depressive episode:

• Symptoms must be severe enough to cause noticeable difficulty in day-to-day activities, such as work, school, social activities or relationships
• Symptoms are not due to the direct effects of something else, such as alcohol or drug use, a medication or a medical condition
• Symptoms are not caused by grieving, such as after the loss of a loved one

\ Mood Nothing changed from last week and that’s a good thing. I’m thrilled I’d been in good spirits the past couple of weeks. I don’t know how long it will last and I don’t give a damn – I’m savoring every second of it. Not much more to tell. I think it’s easier to […]

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Worried about suicidal messages online? Click here By Pieter van Zyl on June 19, 2016 “I can’t go on like this any more. The light at the end of the […]

Well, if I ever wanted to be more involved in my treatment, I’ve got the opportunity now.  My psych nurse practitioner, Sarah, is working on fine-tuning my program as I’ve become a little unsteady in recent weeks, undoubtedly because the Zyprexa’s been decreased. I’m not manic or depressed in particular; what I am is a little of both. It’s like trying to balance myself on a skateboard after standing on good solid concrete…and if you know anything about me, you know I’m not the most graceful person on earth.

But she’s given me the green light to experiment with splitting my doses of Geodon (which has been increased again) at different times of the day, and since I’m having trouble with sleep again, she also added a new medication called trazodone. It’s technically an antidepressant but is used more for sleep than anything else, and I get to play with that one as well because effective dosages vary widely. Many people take around 100-200 mg; I’m starting with 50. Slow and steady wins the race.

The goal of changing all this around is an admirable one: to get me down to the lowest amount of Zyprexa possible, or even (in a perfect world) come off it entirely. That way we can use it as the go-to drug if/when my choo-choo starts going off the rails. The problem with vitamin Z is that it tends to cause problems with cholesterol, encourages metabolic dysfunction, and contributes to diabetes. I already have all of the above, so getting off the stuff would be a great idea.

I just hope I can do it—without becoming unstable!—because even though Zyprexa has always been the single most effective medication for my bipolar, I have a lot of medical issues that might get better if I don’t have to be on it all the time. I’m still taking the 5 mg dose Sarah put me on at the previous visit and am supposed to take another 10 mg if I start ramping up, so we’re not doing this rashly. It’s still a little scary though…the 7.5 mg they put me on in the hospital has kept a lot of the depression away along with the mania. I’d do almost anything to not feel the way I did then ever again. If all else fails, Sarah will put me back on that same dose, but there are lots of combinations with the six meds I’m on now, and one could be the magic bullet.

The bad news is, I’m going to have to come off Klonopin. The state is looking closely at providers’ habits of prescribing controlled substances, and they are being strongly discouraged from giving benzodiazepines. This is going to be tough; I’ve been on benzos for 15 years and withdrawal is supposed to be a gold-plated bitch. I believe it; one time I forgot the vitamin K for three nights and had withdrawal symptoms on the fourth. I felt squeamish, squirmy, couldn’t get comfortable and it seemed as if every synapse was firing all at once. It was most unpleasant. I have a plan though, and I’m going to taper off s-l-o-w-l-y over a period of weeks to months in the hope of escaping most of the ill effects.

So many changes, so little time. Ought to be interesting. I’m self-aware enough now to spot trouble pretty early on, and I won’t hesitate to call Sarah if things go sideways. In the meantime, I kind of like being in the driver’s seat…I just hope I don’t wind up steering myself into a crash!