Daily Archives: June 13, 2012

Shake Hands With…

As originally posted at The Oatmeal, my brain has done exactly this. I totally had a brilliant idea to write about here today… and it wandered off. Really though, all the comics in that vein are apt, ha ha. But as I’m holding onto stability, it’s hard for me to care. It’s almost as if I can finally understand what normal is about — an incident can happen, but after a little bit, you’re fine and back to center again. It feels amazing, frankly. I don’t know how long I can keep it up, but I can relish the feeling. It gives me something to keep working for and towards, knowing that I can feel ‘normal’, ‘normally’.

Of course, the rules of irony and Sod’s Law means I am going to totally get clubbed from behind… again. I did already shake off one situation I would have normally considered brain dire without too many problems, so it behooves me to keep from pulling off self-fulfilling prophecy. Breathe in, breathe out, enjoy what can be enjoyed, bury oneself in pleasurable slacker activities… I’m doing all that I can to keep the mild sense of wary unease at bay. I’m reaffirming things and checking base with my husband so I know where we both stand right now (which, I think, is vital for a good marriage anyways!).

For now… the sun is sort of out for the first time in over a week, and I actually went out in it without dying (I developed some massive hay fever/sinus blockage when I moved here). I’m remembering to do a bit of wiggling about to stretch and strengthen myself. I am applying positive thinking today. Today is a day I intend to win, if only to spite myself. *grins*

<3

I, conundrum

I baffle myself. Like, to no bloody end.

When I am home sometimes, I am so bored I just crave something to go do.

Yet when I am at the shop or running errands, I obsessively think about how I just want to be back at home. My head fills with all the things I could be doing at home, things I enjoy, things I can do in my safe zone.

What is that about?

I was feeling paranoid again today, sure the nasty neighbors were going to bust in to my place or set it on fire because they overheard me telling my dad that I was concerned with getting my power turned off because of their dog pen. The girl gave me a look that should have put me six foot under. I do not like her.

My computer just made a chiming noise.

It was my radio station telling me to click to keep listening.

I thought someone had invaded my computer and was screwing with my head.

Ain’t it grand to be crazy?