So I am feeling a lot better all of a sudden. I am assuming it is the Rexulti. Still having anxiety but will talk about that below.
I sure hope I am just feeling “normal good” and am not getting hypomanic. So far, however, I have avoiding shopping, gambling, and wild, risky sex (darn!) so I think I am okay.
Little account of my week:
Meds I am on:
Lamictal 300 mg, Rexulti 2.0 mg, Wellbutrin 150 mg, Klonopin .25/ 4 x /day
Friday: Feeling better overall. Actually willingly took an early shower. Took Danny (youngest son) out to eat. Had a good conversation. He announced that even though he is vegetarian, he is okay with the rest of the household eating meat. Impressive. I cut up some fabric for my quilt.
FINALLY got the needle changed on my sewing machine. I have been using the same needle for about 3 quilts. My older son glanced at the manual and did it in a flash. I am definitely mechanically challenged. I started sewing the pieces of fabric into the final blocks for the quilt.
I drove myself to get my nails done and felt some anxiety there. But I got it all done and drove myself home. Took a nice walk .
Weird sleeping: 8-4, 5-6, 7-8. Woke up with a headache. Made myself (literally drug myself) up for church for the late service. I came home and watched a baseball game on TV. Husband took me to the store for some new pajamas. Was not nervous riding in the car. Have been visualizing driving as I have been riding. This helps a little.
Slept 9-6. Much better. Had a good morning. Did devotional. (Have been really good about doing this and meditating for 5 minutes. I realize 5 minutes is not much, but it is a start.) Took a shower, got cat and dog off to the groomers, sewed a bit, and made reservations for our anniversary trip. We’re just going to stay a couple of nights at a resort in town. It’s our thirtieth. Good news! We had enough hotel “points” to spend both nights free.
I felt anxious in the afternoon about driving alone but knew I should do it. So I drove over to our women’s group which meets outside a Starbuck’s. When I got there, the group had decided to cancel because it was too windy. I was a little irritated. It meets at 3:45 and they cancelled at 3:15. Several of us were on the road by then. I turned around and drove home. But I guess it was good driving practice.
I made arrangements to get my older son’s windshield replaced. It has a heck of a crack in it. He could care less. But we have glass coverage on our insurance, so hey.
I decided to download and start listening to an audio book. “This Sweet Sickness” by Patricia Highsmith. Pretty good so far. Sort of about unrequited love.
Quite a day. Had decided to find a therapist for my anxiety who specialized in Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT). They had to take Medicare. I found one. She is from South Africa and has the neatest accent. Very kindly and sensible. I am still seeing my regular therapist to deal with other things.
So I woke up at 3. (I think I am falling asleep too early.) Ate some cereal and slept sort of fitfully till 7. Was nervous about meeting the new therapist and the very busy day ahead.
Rode quite a ways to see this new therapist. But she was worth it. Got right to the anxiety topic…did not waste lots of time talking about my parents, which most therapists do. Taught me a routine to follow when I get anxious. Made appointment for next Monday. Rode from there over to see my husband’s cousin who had had a stroke. Judy is doing really well…is up and about and just has some slight short term memory loss. She’s a little wobbly too, but not bad. We’re going to have her over (her daughter, too) for dinner soon. I figure if she gets tired, she can lay on the couch and we can all visit.
Stopped at a restaurant for “Taco Tuesday”. They lost our order and wound up giving us free guacamole, sour cream, and a ten dollar gift card. They were really nice about it. Saw a guy carrying some sort of cherry dessert-looking item. MUST have that if we go back.
Went to my bipolar group. The leader had prostate cancer surgery so we had a nice sub. I missed the leader, though. He is a super guy. Lots of problems as usual but everyone was limping along. My bipolar group meets right next to a gym. We have free access to this gym through my insurance. But the gym changed hands and we had to go sign up again. So we did. I plan on starting to go before my bipolar meeting. Just hop on the treadmill for 30 minutes and then head to the meeting. That will give me one exercise for the week.
I finished sewing the individual blocks for the new quilt. (See pics below). Now I iron the blocks and then start sewing the whole thing together.
My friend is having more trouble with her schizophrenic daughter. I am so worried about the whole thing. My friend is working retail and making basically no money. The daughter is not working now. The live-in boyfriend is not working and gets an allowance from his dad. These people are two weeks or so away from being on the street if something doesn’t get better. We can take in the daughter and my friend…we have one bedroom left. The boyfriend will have to go back home. I don’t anticipate this happening, but who knows? My friend also has absolutely no savings for retirement. She divorced a few years ago and it has been a mess. I talked to her yesterday and she seemed so down. Well, who wouldn’t be? Utter chaos. But the daughter is getting better, so that’s good.
I have a full day planned today (Wednesday). I did my devotional and am writing this blog. Next is shower time and laundry. I have to brush the cat (don’t ask), and iron some of my quilt squares. I’ve got to invite another cousin out for lunch and make more reservations for the summer. I’m going to listen to my audio book. Then at 2, I am going to drive myself to a new yoga class. It’s for people with medical issues and seniors. They do it with chairs. The woman told me you feel GREAT afterwards. I’d like that.
I think after typing all this, I must sound sort of manic. But I feel regular, whatever that is.
Love to you all and see you next week if I have not crashed,