Dear (insert name of employer here),
I do not have a resume prepared as I have not been employed since I went on disability in 2002 thus have little relevant to state since then.
Prior to the brain damage that eventually won my disability claim…I waited tables. I was a hostess. I worked retail in the men’s wear department and housewares. I dabbled in food prep at a grocery store briefly. I tended bar at a private banquet hall for awhile. I did some wood working for a woman with a craft shop until I injured myself. I waited tables again, in a capacity that put me in the position of waiting on dining room customers, washing dishes, mixing shakes, etc, cleaning the floors and bathrooms…I worked for several months as an assistant in a daycare. I dabbed as a retail cashier, which was a struggle as my brain damage left me slightly numerically dyslexic. Not a good quality when handling money.
Prior to the brain damage…I was an assistant retail manager, promoted after only being hired as seasonal help.
I have spent the last several years, once receiving a proper diagnosis for my disability, trying to find the correct medication combination to stabilize me enough to be reliable in an employee capacity. Unfortunately, as always, my condition is medication resistant and I can never stabilize more than four to six months at a time before I borderline hospital ready.
To my credit…I have no simply allowed myself to wither while on disability. I became extremely proficient in computers and use of the internet. I became a first time mother, and a single one, at that. I have learned that when I am stabilized I am pretty amazing at multi tasking. I am frugal, able to find the best deals, I can type fast (never timed my words per minute as it would cause a panic attack and make me perform poorly), and I am task oriented. My mind wanders due to the attention deficit, but given a solid list of tasks to be performed in a certain order, especially at my own pace, I can be quite the whirlwind at whatever task thrown at me.
In addition to my self taught computer skills, I have spent time as an unpaid assistant at a friend’s electronic’s repair shop. I have learned a great deal in the four years I’ve helped out there once or twice a week. I wanted to try my hand at A Plus certification for computer repair but the numeric dyslexia proved a hindrance when dealing with voltages and such. I almost succeeded in frying a computer and myself. I TRIED and I wanted it so desperately but numbers…Simply are not my strong suit.
I have also nourished my hobby of writing (which began when I was 8 years old) over all these years.Even that is impacted by my disabilities due to lack of focus and the rapid onset of depressive and manic symptoms. I make the effort because I love to write and when my mind is balanced…I am very talented as a writer.
I have many skills. I feel I could flourish if given some sort of employment I could do from home, to avoid agitating my anxiety disorder. I perform better if on my own as being micromanaged and watched make me too nervous to work properly. If I am not tied to a time clock and can take a ten minute break due to a panic attack or stress induced stomach issues, I feel I would be an asset to any employer whose work is internet based.
Yes, I have bouts of depression where I can barely get dressed. I struggle just being a parent, let alone juggling it all during the really bad bouts. My anxiety can become so bad, I actually experience paranoia. This is why I think a job from home would actually help me over any job I could physically go to daily. If the issue isn’t compounded with triggers, I could prove to be invaluable as an employee.
I just need someone to give me a chance. Someone who can open their mind beyond a spotty resume. See beyond my past failures, see how much I have grown as a person. How much being a mother has made me mature. I don’t want to be on disability. In many ways, it’s just as stressful as never being stable enough to work. It’s damaging to the self esteem, for sure.
I want to earn a living for my daughter and myself. I want to work for it. I just need an employer who would be willing to work around my disabilities. Really, if I required a wheel chair ramp, the law would enforce it. The mentally imbalanced don’t get this consideration, no matter what the disability act says. We are very much discriminated against.
I want my life back. That means my financial independence, knowing I earn my way, knowing I make a contribution, knowing that somewhere out there…There has to be an employer who believes people are more than their disability, more than their past poor choices and unstable behaviors. People do change, I am proof.
So if any employers out there are game….Please. I’m a hard worker with many great qualities to balance whatever disabilities and detriments I have.
A bipolar job applicant