Idea given by Zoe
Nothing to see here folks, unless you’re just *that* bored or curious. In which case…I took the time to answer these mainly because I can’t come up with anything original with the MOMMY MOMMY MOMMY soundtrack running.
1. What would be harder for you, to tell someone you love them or that you do not love them back?
I’ve done the latter more than the former and it always comes out as “Thank you” as opposed to “I don’t love you too.”
2. What do you think would be the hardest thing for you to give up on?
Myself. Because in spite of my dark humor, my inner optimist reminds me…you just never know what’s going to happen tomorrow.
3. Would you give a homeless person CPR if they were dying?
I don’t know how to do CPR so anyone in my proximity would die.
4. What makes you bored?
Everything that doesn’t revolve around my own interests. (Sounds narcisstic, but seriously…Who wants to hear about Justin Bieber or Taylor Swift if they’re into heavy metal? BOOOORING.)
5. Which is your favorite four legged creature and why?
Large cats- panthers, tigers, lions, leopards. Sleek, beautiful, dangerous.
6. Do you like spicy food and why?
If I want to set my innards on fire, I’ll swallow gasoline and a match, thank you very much.
7. Are you old fashioned?
I prefer the term retro-modern. I like my cars old and square shaped with a V-8 and I like my computers new enough to run the latest version of flash and not use old floppy disks. I like VCRs because, well, I just do (Could record 8 hours on a VHS tape, now I’m lucky to get three hours on a dvd, wtf.) . I like MP3 digital files because I don’t need storage racks for the cases and discs. Little bit of both.
8. Something or someone you miss the most from childhood?
This shithole tavern in my shithole town used to sell this beef jerky for a quarter and it was soo sweet and flavorful, I never had any money cos I spent it all on that stuff. Then it went away. I miss it more than anything else, sadly.
9. Are you usually late, early or right on time?
Try to be early for some stuff, in hopes they’ll fit me in early and I can just get it the fuck over with.
10. Are you happy with your life for the most part right now?
“Accepting with a grudge” is more apt a description til the meds straighten out.
11. You can have one of the follow two things: trust / love?
Trust. I can’t love someone I can’t trust. And like Fox Mulder, my motto has become “trust no one.” Meh, love is overrated.
12. Tell me about your favorite book, magazine, or comic?
Books. Anything forensic/medical mystery/murder mystery. Cliche as it may be, my favorite book ever was S.E. Hinton’s “The Outsiders.” Just spoke to me because I always felt like an outsider.
13. Tell me about someone you envy?
Anyone who can still do the things they love in spite of their mental illness. I can’t do concerts, public meals, amusement parks, carnivals, bars, nightclubs-
pretty much anything that involves crowds.
14. Tell me about something you’ve achieved?
I’ve managed to keep my kid alive and happy for almost six years in spite of being “mental”, which is more than can be said about her donor.
15. [TRIGGER WARNING] Tell me about the worst punishment you had when you were a child?
I got spanked once with a belt by my dad. I never pissed him off to that extent again, least til my teen years. Then my speeding tickets earned me a kick frm his steel toed boot to my hip and butt cheek. Does that sound abusive? I never considered it that way, just my dad being a dick.
16. Do you like chocolate?
It’s a mood thing, and only certain kinds of chocolate. I wouldn’t die without it.
17. Do you like rainy days or snowy winter days more?
Case can be made in favor and against both. In the midwest, you get what you get, like it or not.
18. Name 3 things in nature you find most beautiful?
Waterfalls, oceans, rainstorms.
19. Which are your 2 favorite careers and why?
Artist- because my kid is 5 and draws better than I can, pisses me off.
Writer- it would be awesome to get paid to do what you love.
20. What is the hardest thing you ever had to do?
Get out of bed in the morning every day.
21. When was the last time you lied and to whom and why?
If I am speaking out loud to others, I am probably lying. Only because they don’t want to hear the truth about how I am doing or how I feel. It’s a challenge to plaster on a smile and say, “That’s awesome” as opposed to, “God, you really make me want to stab you in the eye with a BBQ fork.”
22. Tell me about something you really regret.
That I was so submissive in my mental health treatment that I lost so many years to a wrong diagnosis, wrong meds, and really shitty doctors.
23. What scares you the most and why?
Anything to do with losing my daughter. I’m afraid to even let her play outside lest I look away for two minutes and be accused of being unfit. It happens.
Parenting today is terrifying.
24. What do you do in your free time?
Read, write, watch TV shows, listen to music, stare off into space while tuning out the constant soundtrack of MOMMY MOMMY MOMMY MOMMY.
25. Which is your favorite part of the human face and why?
Eyes. Least favorite is the nose, noses are just icky.
26. Which is your favorite body part of the human body and why?
Were I to be completely shallow…Hair. Loooove long hair on men. You could look like Jaba The Hut but if you have awesome hair, I’m in. Truthfully, it’s personality more than looks. My first ex husband’s nickname was “Cryptkeeper” so obviously, IDGAF.
27. Tell me about a mistake you made.
I’ve made a lot of bad choices but to say any were a mistake I’d undo would take away all that I’ve gained by going through the crap. Learning to live with your mistakes is what makes you grow.
28. If you could do anything or wish for anything that would come true, what would you wish?
STABILITY THAT LASTS. If I had that, I could work two jobs, support my kid, save, get the fuck out of this place, and live functionally ever after. I have zero desire for idle wealth. I want to DO something that makes me feel alive. Until the scumbag brain cooperates…I may as well wish for unicorns to be real.
29. What’s your middle name?
Nicole. AKA MY MOTHER WASN’T COOL ENOUGH TO ACTUALLY NAME ME MORGUETICIA.
30. How big is your bed?
Full size, though with all the cats and the kid and my body pillow…May as well be a twin for all the moving room I get.
31. What music are you listening to right now?
Um..Music not within anxiety capability. Half watching/listening to some Clinton Conspiracy video on youtube R called me and insisted I should watch it since I am a conspiracy theorist. AND….Just cos you’re paranoid doesn’t mean they aren’t out to get you, ffs.
32. What are the last 4 digits in your cellphone number?
1472. 6666 and 1313 weren’t available.
33. What was the last thing you ate?
I had a couple of pieces of thin slice ham this morning so my meds didn’t make me spew. Last GOOD thing I ate was Crazy Bread from Little Caesar’s last night.
34. Tell me about your favorite music / song / band.
Wednesday 13/ 30 Seconds To Mars. The ears like what the ears like, sue me.
35. Tell me something you would happily do again.
Have my spawn. Crazy as she makes me, she’s my legacy. So happy, so energetic, so loving of all people. Everything I am not. Proof that mental illness isn’t some personality trait you’ll infect your kids with.
36. Name your 5 favorite books?
The Outsiders, duh. Diary Of Ellen Rimbauer. Night Sins. In A Child’s Name. Pet Semetary.
37. Good questions to ask people to know them more?
“Do you like animals?” People who don’t like animals/pets are most likely evil. Just saying.
38. Do you like to shop?
On line and at yard sales, mood and money permitting. Otherwise, I’d rather have a root canal.
39. How often do you go online?
Duuude, since I traded up from dial up to cable net I don’t go OFF line. Not that I am glued to the computer, just…It’s my tether outside this armpit town, shutting it down severs that. DO NOT WANT.
40. Tell me about someone you really admire.
Wednesday 13. He just does what he feels, even if it means putting music out on his own label on a smaller scale and using his own money. I RESPECT artists who do it for the love of the artform, not just for money and chicks.